Yesterday, we had an OB appointment, and everything went well thankfully. I am told that if I have more than 6 contractions in an hour to go to the ER, and that I can try lots of water and pee alot and lay on my left side to try and help them to stop. The most Ive had now is 3 in an hour, which caused a little panic, but I am fine.
Everyone appears so genuinely happy that we are past the 28 week mark, including the doctors. There are alot of doctors in this practice, so I rarely get to see one I know each time I go, but our doctor yesterday wanted to already schedule the removal of the cerclage which won't be until I am 36/37 weeks. I really do not like to schedule anything in advance of 2 weeks, as I feel I jinxed myself making all of those appointments last year with the girls. Who am I to say I will be pregnant still at 36/37 weeks? I am no one! I have no control over this, so why should I plan ahead until Autumn gets here safe? These are the thoughts that run through my mind on a daily basis. I wish it weren't so, but it is.
While I am extremely happy to have gotten this far, I have found myself crying every day this week, about something really stupid, or something really serious. I tried to move forward a few times, and broke down. Going into T.arget the past few times has left me a hysterical mess. We did manage to buy two inexpensive baby gates that we will be putting up (one on top of the other) in front of the nursery to act as our "screen", maybe we will try that today or tomorrow. The rest, well, I am shopping online for sure. Yesterday, I bought online what I consider Autumn's first purchase, which was a crib mattress. So in the same breath of saying "why should I plan ahead?", I am trying to plan her arrival in small steps so I can be ready if/when we make it. I am allowing the online browsing for baby things, I am allowing the scheduling nurse to call me to schedule the cerclage removal, I am allowing myself to look into private or in-home classes for some preparedness with lactation, birth and baby care (and if that is not available I will pick brains and read a ton). But sometimes along with this, comes anxiety, tears, hope, grief, fear, happiness, and you just don't know where you stand. You feel you are burdening everyone with the constant back and forth thoughts that most don't understand. Another topic that has come up is a baby shower. And all I can think is, how does anyone expect me to be able to sit through a baby shower, when I can't even shop in a store around others without breaking down? I refuse to fake my way through something like that, the visual triggers ignite the tears. It is such a genuine gesture, but I cannot see myself in that situation yet, so I compromise and say "maybe after Autumn's safe arrival", and even then it's if-y.
I realize this post is all over the place, back and forth between grief and hope. But that is our life, and many others like mine. I write this to get my thoughts out on paper (well, blog paper) and de-stress. I write this to let someone else know they aren't alone. I write this to tell anyone who wants to know, where I am at mentally. I write to relieve some grief, and let in some hope.
Love, Nan xxxooo

7 comments:
Thinking of you! Prayers that Autumn WILL be here safe and sound. Do what is comfortable to you, I am proud of you for buying a crib! You are making small steps to get ready for her. ((hugs)) Excited for the day that you get your cerclage removed. You are doing awesome!
Nan, first of all let me say that i am happy you have made it to 28 weks and look forward to hearing you say "i am now 30wks" I believe you can make it further but i have been taking things slowly, even with myself. I understand the back and forth, sometimes i feel myself getting happy which in turn makes me scared. I hope your contractions slow down to none at all. And i understand about the baby shower. Maybe you could have a small one a few weeks after autumn is born. I hope your heart eases some sweet friend. Know that i am thinking of you. Just take things slow. It's not about anybody else. It's about you and autumn. Sending you hugs and lots of love.
Oh friend---just sending you lots of love and prayers...and so excited to send little Autumn something--whether it's before or after she's born. I'm with Shandrea, whatever you need and feel like, that's it!
Hugs!!!
Sweetest Friend,
I understand you fears and all that you describe. However, you "are allowing yourself" the freedom to do things on your terms and that in itself is liberating :) Take things one minute at a time and move at your own pace and that is the recipe for success.
As for the baby shower, we do something here in the South called a "Sip and See". A Sip and See is a shower of sorts AFTER a baby's arrival. It can be done anytime :) Also, if you elect to NOT have a shower of any sort, that is okay too. Do this on your terms honey. Do what is best for your mental well being, as that is the MOST important.
I LOVE YOU!!! Just be good to yourself and I'm here for you when ever you need me :)
xoxo
PS
Sing to the little Grasshopper for me :)
Aunt Bebe
Right there with you! I've been told the same thing about the contractions- and I actually was at 6 an hour a few weeks back, but since they weren't strong, I was ok. I didn't schedule my removal yet, either. But, if I make it, it will be around 5/20. Im doing my private birthing class next Sat (if I make it), shopping exclusively online, and no baby shower til' she comes home. I hear you on all fronts. You are doing amazing!! Congrats on 28 weeks! xo
I'm so glad you just found me - I just saw how many blog friends we had in common, and how close our due dates are!
I just relate to this post so much! It's amazing how the grief and the hope are all wound up together, aren't they? I feel this surge of worry every time I buy something online, like it's jinxing something. I am guessing this worry doesn't go away until we have our babies in our arms!
Oh, Nan! "In between grief and hope". That is just so....it. It's just so it. In between it, around it, on it, under it. It's insane what we go through.
I just love and hate that I know that we are having almost the exact same feelings. Love it because I loooove and am so thankful for your support and it's so good to know I'm not alone, and hate it becuase I wish no one else had to go through what we are!
Hang in there, sweet Nan.
xoxo
Post a Comment